Live With Integrity: Trust Your Gut

I've learned that to ignore the still, small voice -- of logic, conscience, or whatever you may call it -- inside of me is a Bad idea. Too many times have I pretended that a decision that I made was the right one when all along my gut was telling me otherwise.

Moreover, marginalizing that still, small voice and delaying a decision is usually just as difficult as making the wrong decision. In my career as an educator, I have procrastinated making a phone call or sending an email because the results could be painful. If only I could bottle the feeling of relief after resolving conflict. That would indeed be a valuable and potent elixir. One swig would remind me that to take care of a problem quickly and with integrity is nothing to fear.

My "gut" and I had our first professional "run-in" about 15 years ago. I was running a university summer music camp that had clearly defined rules and regulations that governed student behavior. During the first night of the week-long camp, two campers chose to break the rules. The following morning, it was my responsibility to call their parents and tell them to return to the university, pick them up, and take them home without the refund of several hundred dollars each. The plot thickened, as one of these two was the daughter of a university regent. For the sake of the other campers, I took swift and decisive action and trusted my gut. Luckily, the result was anything but painful. The parents understood, the campers went home, and my sense of relief is still memorable.

Some of us deal with important and difficult decisions every day in our profession. If not there, our personal lives are full of decisions that need us to be honest and forthright because they can -- and do -- affect other people.

What I found over time, though, is that confronting a decision and trusting my still, small voice has resulted in better outcomes than I could hope for.

Whether or not a decision was ultimately right or wrong, if I have made it based on integrity and/or my best intentions, I know that I will be more comfortable with dealing with any possible, difficult aftermath -- I have moral ground upon which to stand.

What is your still, small voice saying to you? Trust it.

 

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Being Out of the Box: Part 1

Have a look at this video I found recently. As you watch, keep in mind that the silver sedan has its windows open:

Thanks to a good friend of mine, Alan Feirer, I discovered two books that have already shaped the way I interact with each person with whom I come in contact. The Arbinger Institute has published two critically acclaimed tomes: Leadership and Self Deception and its follow up book, The Anatomy of Peace.

The mission of the Institute is to help people understand that improved effectiveness as a person can be had by looking within at how we see other people. It rises out of many decades of research and has a firm grounding in philosophy.

At its essence, the philosophy of improving our effectiveness boils down to whether we see other people as objects that stand in the way of our own goals of achievement and/or advancement, or if we see others as people just like us; with the same kinds of hopes, dreams, worries and fears as ourselves. Seeing others as objects is referred to by Arbinger as being "in the box."

Would you say that the drivers in the video are considerate of each other's humanity? Um, no. Each saw the other as in the way, and the driver of the SUV went so far as to feel justified enough to retaliate for what he or she felt was a wrong doing.

The humbling thing about thinking of people as objects is that we all do it at different times each and every day. We probably see people this way more often than we care to admit. This is a HARD truth, and one that I continue to grapple with.

According to these great books, how does one more specifically climb into or out of the box? Find out:

Being Out of the Box: Part 2

Being Out of the Box: Part 3

 

 

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What Kung Fu Panda and an Ancient Poem Have in Common

 

As Master Oogway said in the animated film "Kung Fu Panda," 

Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called "The Present." 

Profound words, especially coming from an old turtle. I'm fairly sure this quote came from somewhere else, as the "Kung Fu Panda" writers were probably not philosophers. Nonetheless, I have found that this is but one of the solid life lessons to be learned in that movie. My kids have seen it about 30 times and I don't mind one bit!

There is a set of verses I came across a few months ago that serve to amplify that saying above. If you have never heard, read or experienced this ancient Indian poem, "Salutation to the Dawn," I think you will find that it brings to the fore the very idea of living each day to the fullest. From the time this poem was written to today, the thought of living life to the fullest must resonate if we are to thrive. 

The joy of self discovery begins when you simply start to look. The more I look, the more I find the path I take twists and turns in unexpected directions. For example, I found this poem recently while reading Dale Carnegie's How To Win Friends and Influence People of all places. I would have never read this book had it not been for another I read before, and I would have never read that one had it not been for another...you get the idea.

This path is one I hope you find yourself on as well!

Here's the poem:

Look to this day!

For it is life, the very life of life.

In its brief course

Lie all the verities and realities of your existence:

The bliss of growth

The glory of action

The splendor of beauty.

For yesterday is but a dream

And tomorrow only a vision

But today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness

And every tomorrow a vision of hope.

Look well, therefore to this day!

Such is the salutation to the dawn.

- Kalidasa, Indian Poet

Harvey Enders composed music to accompany this poem. If you have five minutes to be inspired by song today, listen below. 

Here's to living today to the fullest!